To the person who hacked my yahoo account, I wonder what's it's like to be dateless, friendless, and living in your parents basement while masturbating to German schiza porn.
Another Descent Into...
New Writing Projects-
It has been a week of new writing-related projects. First up,
Dead On Earth-This is a brand new idea from writers Cal Miller and Ryan Phillip Harris. Myself and 29 other writers(DBH Mastermind Rhonda Kacur and fellow writer friend Angie Hill two of them) have been given task to follow serial killer Wayne Holiday through journal entries as written by our created characters. It's late 2012 and the whole world is literally about to change. I've completed two entries so far and I must say, I'm enjoying this.
Big Daddy Horror Reviews-In the future, I will be logging book reviews for Brandon Sites fantastic
bigdaddyhorrorreviews.com website. Check it out!
Predators(2010)-
This past Monday, girlfriend in tow, I cast a weary, sleepy eye toward the latest in the Predator franchise. I hoped for one thing and one thing only in this film. I didn't get it. Ever since Jesse Ventura's response to his bleeding in the original movie, it has been badly uttered tagline after another. Oh sure, the action is top notch as expected. The Predators in this movie have been given an upgrade and not a very good one.
The film begins with former US Army Special Forces soldier and now mercenary, Royce (Adrien Brody), awakening in freefall over a jungle. Upon landing, he is confronted by heavily-armed individuals including Cuchillo, a Mexican drug cartel enforcer (Danny Trejo), Nikolai, a Russian Spetsnaz soldier (Oleg Taktarov), and Isabelle, an IDF black ops sniper (Alice Braga). They encounter more people dropped from the sky, including Mombasa, an RUF officer (Mahershalalhashbaz Ali), who is fighting with Stans, a US Death Row inmate (Walton Goggins), Hanzo, a silent Yakuza enforcer (Louis Ozawa Changchien), and Edwin, an American doctor (Topher Grace). The group finds out that all of them have no idea of how they got to the jungle. Deciding that they should all stick together, they all venture in one direction to find possible aid.
After escaping a series of man-made booby-traps (left by U.S. Special Forces member, who had been killed weeks before), the group are attacked by several dog-like alien creatures. While the group manages to kill some of the creatures, a few of them manage to corner Cuchillo. Soon the creatures are called back by a high-pitched whistle. The group hears Cuchillo's voice in the distance and find him being used as bait for a trap. In an act of mercy killing, Isabelle shoots Cuchillo, not knowing that he was already dead and his voice was being mimicked by one of the Predators. After they reach higher ground, Royce realizes that they are on an alien game preserve planet, and are being hunted as game by some unknown hunters. The previous creatures were being used as hunting dogs to flush them out. Royce leads the group to a Predator hunting camp, where they find a captive 'classic' Predator tied to a totem pole. Royce bides his time until the Predators attack, killing Mombasa with spears while the rest of the group escapes to a river.
After being attacked by a bipedal insectoid creature flushed out by Edwin, they meet a U.S. Air Cavalry Soldier named Noland (Laurence Fishburne), who has survived on the planet for years by scavenging and hiding in an abandoned drilling structure. Deranged from his long isolation, Noland reveals that the Predators have been harvesting warriors from Earth and other planets for centuries, using them to improve their hunting skills. He also reveals that there is a blood feud between two clans of Predators: the classic Predators and the larger, more aggressive 'super' Predators — three of whom are hunting the humans. Noland also reveals the existence of the ship that the Predators use to reach the planet. Noland sarcastically remarks that he never thought to commandeer the ship, but that Royce must know how to fly it. Royce points out that the classic Predator strung up in the hunting camp might.
Later that night, Noland attempts to murder the group. To escape, Royce alerts the hunting Predators, who break into the ship, killing Noland. Edwin falls behind as the group escapes, and Nikolai sacrifices his life saving Edwin, using an explosive to destroy himself and a Predator. Outside, the Super Predators show themselves to be less honorable hunters than the Classic Predators when one fires on an unarmed Stans. Stans is brutally killed while saving Royce, and Hanzo stays behind to face the Predators. Wielding a centuries old authentic samurai katana which he found amongst Noland's possessions, he engages a Predator in single combat. Hanzo defeats the Predator at the cost of his own life. As the final three humans escape, Edwin is crippled by a trap. Isabelle refuses to abandon him, and Royce returns to the hunting camp to free the classic Predator in exchange for boarding the ship. Isabelle and Edwin are captured by the final super Predator, who throws them into a pit. Edwin temporarily paralyzes Isabelle by cutting her with his scalpel covered in neurotoxin and reveals that he is a psychopathic serial killer who wishes to stay on the planet to become like the Predators.
The classic Predator activates the ship, and engages the super Predator in combat, giving Royce the time he needs to get to the ship. After a brief but fierce battle, the classic Predator is overpowered and decapitated, and the Super Predator remotely destroys the ship, ensuring that nobody leaves the planet. Royce, having never actually boarded the ship, returns to rescue Isabelle. After Edwin attempts to paralyze Royce as well, Royce disarms him and booby-traps Edwin's body with grenades and uses him as bait in a trap for the super Predator, killing Edwin in the process. Royce disorients the Predator and after a violent fight, Royce defeats and decapitates it as Isabelle shakes off the paralysis. They bond and tell each other their names.
The film closes by showing Isabelle and Royce sitting together by the remains of a fire, watching the sky as more humans and other aliens are being dropped into the jungle. Royce says to Isabelle that it's time to find a way off the planet, and they walk away into the jungle.
The characters are cardboard, the dialogue is bad, the Predators bled day-glo and Topher Grace plays a doctor. UGH! What works best? Is when the humans don't talk! That is what will make a great Predator film(first one exempt cuz Ah-Nuld just is too damn awesome). 5/10(I think I'm being generous with that, btw)
Lebron James-
Last week, we were subjected with THE QUESTION. Where will NBA All-Everything Lebron James play this upcoming season? I swear ESPN was drooling harder than a dog in the back of a meat wagon. I really think the sports channel has officially jumped the shark. I mean an hour special on THE DECISION? Is this what we have come to? Wasting more of our time with such trivial b.s. It's not where he ended up that bothered me, he's a grown man and has to do what he feels best. No, to me it's the over hype, the over saturation, the dog-and-pony show.
I am so sick of the media trying to control what little minds we have left. Sick of them putting a guy (a titleless guy at that) on a pedestal that he does not deserve. What has he done other than entertain people? Nothing noteworthy for me. They won't give Joe Schmoe an hour long special on where he/she is going to work?
The Cinema Snob-
I'm late in posting this but in the latest episode from El Snob-io, it's a WTF, banned in the UK movie, Island of Death...no it does not take place in Aruba.
Thanks Ang for making my brand new header!
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